untitled

i stare into emptiness
i feel nothing
it's just a hollow space
the void that's inside
i'm not there
i don't feel exist
i'm not needed
sometimes i want to crash a car
sometimes i want to jump off a building
sometimes i want to slit my throat with a knife
i imagine myself doing it, always
but i'm too scared to commit anything
people around me, i only see faces
i don't feel their presence
because i'm not needed
i laughed with them, i smiled
but just for a while
there's something in me
which is not there
somebody predicts my future, telling me i'm going to live longer
but i'm not sure if that's a good thing, whether it's true or not
i don't want to live long enough to be sucked in loneliness
i'd rather die
because i'm not needed
i feel like i'm gone into thin air
unseen, intangible
going with the flow
nobody was certain if i'm really exist
yeah, that would be nice
i would vanish in a blink of an eye
because i'm not needed